Sometimes, the best wedding present that we can receive is some cold, hard cash!
However, that is not exactly easy to ask for and can come across as a little rude.
So, if you want cash for your wedding day, how can you ask your guests for it politely? What makes for the perfect wording for money as wedding gift material?
Thankfully, there are a few ways in which you can politely ask your guests for cash instead of a present; however, it does demand a lot of care and careful wording.
Here’s what you’re going to need to keep in mind.
Is It OK to Ask for Cash Instead of Wedding Gifts?
Yes, it’s perfectly fine to ask for money for your wedding. Asking for cash could give you a bit extra for your honeymoon fund or to help furnish a new home, etc.
As children, we are brought up to believe that it is bad manners to ask for money as a gift no matter the occasion.
There was indeed a time when asking for money as a wedding gift was deemed inappropriate, and even rude by guests.
Instead, guests would usually buy items that the happy couple could use in their new home together, such as decor pieces, kitchen appliances, glassware, bowls, table sets, etc.
However, nowadays, it is understood that most married couples live together long before they tie the knot.
Therefore, they tend to already have all of the home items that they could possibly need.
More often than not, what they actually need is help with expensive bills, upcoming projects, and a way to start their new life together as a married couple right.
All of that entails getting their hands on some money!
Therefore, it is not as poorly seen to ask for money as a wedding gift as it once was.
In fact, more often than not, couples are taking strides to ask for money instead of gifts.
However, as is the case with all things, there is a certain protocol.
You should not simply ask for money, a set amount, when and how you want it, etc.
In order for your request to not be deemed as completely rude or unreasonable, it is vital to understand and use a certain etiquette when asking for cash money instead of gifts.
How Do You Politely Ask for Money as A Wedding Gift?
Letting your guests know that you’d prefer cash over presents doesn’t have to be awkward. Here’s how to refine your writing.
Don’t be demanding
The very worst couples are the ones who are demanding about what they want and how they want it!
Being frank – no one likes these couples, and being too demanding with your wedding gifts can create tensions between you and your loved ones.
Although you may be hoping for a certain amount of money, there is no reason to enforce that on your guests.
Do not request a minimum amount as a wedding gift.
Your guests will bring you what they can, but being told that you expect at least a certain amount will only offend them and likely lead them to give nothing or very little.
Therefore, be generous as much as you can and do not appear too greedy – your relationships may be at stake!
Set up an online registry
There are plenty of great websites, such as GiftSpaces, that provide you with the opportunity to set up gift registries that all of your guests can see.
Simply share the link with all of your guests, and allow them to browse what you want.
That way, it is an easy way for them to give and even see what you would like as a gift that isn’t just cash.
It will also help them to see if certain gifts have already been bought, to save on double presents!
Don’t set rules
Some may prefer to give you a check, while others may prefer to send it online or give it in cash.
It is not up to you to say how you want the money!
Let your guests choose how they want to give the cash to you.
Provide a gift registry for those who do not want to give cash
As was previously mentioned, not all guests will want to give cash.
No matter how nicely you put it, they may not feel as though it is appropriate, even on their behalf.
Therefore, they will likely prefer to give you a gift instead, for which they will need a gift registry or list to work from.
They are easy to make online, even on Amazon.
However, for those who may not have access to the internet, present them with a nice list of general ideas.
Try to make it as diverse as possible, to ensure that it will suit their budget, no matter what it is.
Do not mention it in the wedding invitations!
Some people directly include their money requests in their wedding invitation, which is tacky to say the least!
The invitation is for your guests and should only mention them, yourself, the wedding day date and the venue.
You can include the request on a separate note in the envelope, but avoid putting it directly on the wedding invitation wherever possible.
Let your guests know what the money will be used for
To make the guests feel a little better about giving you money, let them know what you plan on spending it on.
Whether it is for your honeymoon fund, the wedding day expenses, your new home, etc – your guests will appreciate having that extra insight into your life and knowing that you are not just taking their money for the sake of it!
Make your request fun!
One of the best ways to ask for money instead of a gift is by making it fun.
One of the most common ways to do that nowadays is by writing a short and unique poem about your request.
It does not have to be complicated; in fact, the lighter, the better!
But it makes the request a little less demanding and a little more fun for everyone involved.
Remember to thank your guests for whatever they give
It is important to remember that no matter what you ask for, your guests will only give you what they can, and that may not be in cash gifts.
However, it is important to remember that your loved ones will do what they can, and sometimes at best, that is just making it to the special day.
Remember to be grateful and to thank them for being there.
Be genuine and do not be disappointed about the money – even if you could use a little more!
What Do You Write on A Wedding Invitation when Asking for A Monetary Gift?
It is never a good idea to ask for money directly on the wedding invitations. Instead, keep them plain and simple and ask for your guests’ presence on your special day.
If you want to include a note regarding the cash wedding gift, then write it on an extra piece of paper and insert it into the same envelope as the invitations.
Remember to not ask for a set amount or even a form.
You could simply say, ‘instead of a physical gift, please consider giving a monetary gift to help us get the honeymoon, home, wedding day, car, etc., of our dreams.’
However, you can mention that you would prefer cash, but that the guests should feel free to give whatever they choose.
How Do You Ask for Money for Your Wedding in Person?
If you plan on asking friends and family for a money gift in person, then the wording is important.
However, thankfully, it can resemble that of what you would put in a card, too.
Simply refer to what you and your spouse would like to spend the money on, mention that you do not mind how much anyone could give, anything would be appreciated, and that while a gift would always be appreciated, at the moment, cash would be best.
Honesty, graciousness and humility are vital.
How Do You Ask for Donations Instead of Wedding Gifts?
Instead of directly asking for a wedding gift, you could set a donation box at the wedding, in which your guests could put whatever amount in they want.
You could even get creative and make it a little more light hearted by putting something like a wishing well down.
A wishing well makes it like they are getting something in return (A “wish”) for their cash gifts at your wedding.
They could even put them in envelopes to let you know who gave what – or make them anonymous simply by putting the money in.
This is a great way of ensuring that those who can only give a little will not be denounced and that the stress of having to choose a wedding gift is taken away from your guests.
Getting the right wording for money as a wedding gift can be a little tricky. It can be easy to sound greedy, demanding and ungrateful when asking for money.
However, with the right tact, you can get the gifts that you want without disappointing any of your loved ones!
However, the etiquette goes beyond the request.
Whatever you have received, be it gifts instead of money, a lot of money, or only a small amount, remember to be grateful and to thank each and every guest personally.
It is best to send personalized cards to each guest as a special thank you, one that they will all appreciate.